This week we had a scare. I noticed some spotting after using the restroom and my heart began to pound. I felt like my worst fear was happening. Something was going wrong. I called Mike before calling my midwife practice. After several calls back and forth between the midwife practice and the midwife on call at the hospital, Mike came to pick me up and we headed to the labor and delivery floor.
I had just texted my friend Chelsea to pray for us, Chelsea and I text each other several times a week with our daily challenges and prayer requests. Having a friend to share that with is priceless. I believe those prayers made a huge difference because I felt my worry literally melting away.
After getting bejeweled with my hospital jewelry (aka my hospital bracelet), changing into one of those lovely SeeMoreButts gowns, and settling into our room, we enjoyed listening to Caroline's heartbeat on the fetal monitor while our nurse and midwife popped in and out to discuss next steps with us. Seeing one of the midwives from our practice was so reassuring. I really love the midwives- they are so patient to explain everything to me and spend all the time with me I need. After several hours, several tests, and several conversations with the midwife and attending OB physician we were heading out. Caroline was absolutely fine, as active and healthy as ever. It all ended up being just that, a scare. On our way home we drove through the Chick-fil-A drive through for grilled sandwiches...we were starving after so long at the hospital. After getting home I was absolutely exhausted. I hadn't realized how much adrenaline had been coursing through my body.
Reflecting on these events I'm reminded that a lot of the fuss we allow to take up our time and attention while preparing for a baby isn't really all that important. When I was at the hospital I wasn't concerned about finishing my baby registry, or picking out a bassinet, or fancy diaper bags. There's this pressure when you're preparing for a baby to have this adorable cute nursery, to have the most popular nursery items, to have a stylish diaper bag, to eat organically, to have a completely natural delivery, to have an organic mattress. I'm not exaggerating on the last one. If I could count how many times I've seen the importance of an organic crib mattress pushed in baby magazines and on baby websites.
Now I'm not saying these things have no significance. I'm hoping and planning for a completely natural delivery with one of the midwives from my midwife practice. I'm trying to eat as nutritionally as I can for this little one and when it fits into our grocery budget organically too. I want her to have a fun, cute nursery. I understand that organic green nursery items, including a mattress, are great things to have when you can afford them. But you know what- Caroline's snap and go Graco stroller was bought second hand at a local consignment store. Instead of a brand-new fancy glider and gliding ottoman Caroline's nursery rocking chair will be the same one my mom used when I was a baby, refinished with white paint by my dad. Her mattress definitely isn't organic, nor is her crib bedding. And the Gala apples I've been craving for snacks are conventionally grown, not organic because we're saving money for diapers and a car seat and all those baby things.
If at the end of these next few months Caroline comes into this world via c-section rather than the natural birth I have planned for - If she's wearing a second hand sleeper I picked up at my favorite baby consignment store- If I haven't gotten around to hanging pictures on her cheerful green nursery walls because I'm spending that money on cloth diapers instead- she'll be just as loved and cherished.
At the end of the day we're celebrating this precious life God has given us, not the accessories that we buy for her. Though the tiny clothes are cute and the diaper bags are fun to pick out, these things are just that "things", and not as precious as Caroline.
Any of you other mommies ever feel that pressure to buy the perfect _____ for your little one? How do you handle the pressures that social media, stores, and blogs put on us as moms?